Inn

So, as I am sure everyone can tell only one week has passed since I last posted here.... *cough, cough*

Well, anyways. Today's word is inn.

Somehow, whenever I hear the word inn, I immediately think 'fantasy'. Tolkien's Lord of the Rings with it's The Prancing Pony or RPGs like Dragon Age, Skyrim or the likes. Inns whichever way you look, almost.

These are all good and nice associations, and I am glad they still top what next comes into mind. Namely, one summer I spent a few weeks working at this horrible Bed and Breakfast... And when I say horrible I really mean it.

The location was beautiful enough. It felt close to nature and was great for talking walks and such. The house, not an inn but close enough, was in an extremely bad state though. Even to the point where I'd call it health hazardous... I still shudder when I think back at that house. And the owner, well, he was no better.

Nowadays I can look back at my time there and laugh, but at the time it was not so much fun. There was absolutely nothing of the homely coziness that I, in my fantasy-infused mind, associate with inns, and it was even worse than those bawdy, noisy inns that also pop up here and there in the fantasy genre.

With that I shall wrap up my reminiscences about past work-experiences, and also bring this blog-post to an end.

Inn and out!

Pen

There are about a million and five things I could write about upon seeing the word pen.
But, as I am busy I will keep it simple.

Pens made me think of drawing, something I do whenever I can find the time to spare.
I also enjoy water-colouring. And, as I'm sure some users of watercolours also have done, I have made the infamous mistake of drinking the water I use to clean the brushes... Blergh!
It's funny how your brain can short-circuit in that way.

Anyways, this leads me to today's subject, which is kind of similar.

I was drinking beer from a glass, which I usually don't, but it was a large can and in order to keep it cold I opted for a glass while keeping the can in the refrigerator. So, eventually I finished my large can of beer and decided to drink some water. So I filled the glass with water, drank some of it, and replaced the glass to were I usually keep it (stupidly just next to my laptop).

After a while I found myself craving more beer, and having anticipated this possibility I had also purchased a small can of beer in addition to the large one. This time I chose to drink straight out of the can.

Well, placing the can (stupidly) next to my computer I continued working on my current project. The time ticked by and soon I found it was time for another mouthful of beer, so I grab the glass and drank. I drank a few mouthfuls, as a matter of fact, before I noticed it was water. I thought it tasted kind of bland and not so bubbly, but not until I actually swallowed a few mouthfuls did it occur to me I was drinking water...

I mean, how dense is my brain?

Heh, somehow I find it all quite funny.

Balcony

So, the word of the day is balcony... When I saw this I almost instantaneously regretted my 'oh so amazing' idea from the other day. However, I shall stay true to my word (stupid though as it might have been to agree to write about basically anything) and see this through. So, let's see how this works out.

To me balconies can be either invigorating or extremely confining.

My first instinct was to say that this depended on the view - beautiful landscapes equal invigoration and urban milieus stand for the confinement - but the more I thought about it the more I came to realise that this wasn't the case at all. I mean, the view from my balcony is anything but breathtaking. It's just cars, some trees, a road and a couple of tower blocks - nothing all too special in other words. Still, I like being out there.

So, perhaps what I find important is not actually the view but rather the balcony itself.

I like balconies to have a small space for me to sit down with my thoughts. A place where I can quietly observe the world below without being a direct part of it. As long as I have this I couldn't care less whether it's a lake, a forest, a highway or a bunch of semi-detached houses that I'm resting my eyes on. Every place has it's own story to tell. Anything can be inspirational.

A confining balcony on the other hand, well... think of it as a lump of concrete slabbed onto a wall, and so small you can barely stand out there... Not too enticing if you ask me... I mean, I just don't see the point of such a balcony as a window would fill precisely the same purpose.

No, balconies should be like a breath of fresh air where I can drink my coffee in peace.

Me and the world - separated and yet so close...

An Idea

I promised myself to start blogging more this year, and so far I am doing rather poorly on that front. But, it's never too late to change, right?

I have finally reached a decision. 

My major problem was that I felt like I had absolutely nothing to blog about, at least most days... Now this problem should be solved, because I have come up with an amazing way to both challenge and inspire myself to write more. What I'll do is I'll use a random word generator and then blog about whatever word I'm given. 

Seeing as the topics can be very varied I imagine some blog post will remain relatively short or just come out plain weird... But, hey, it could turn out to be really interesting, too. 

I aiming for about one post per week as a minimum, and I guess we'll see how it goes from now on. 

Wish me luck :) 

...

Slow is the Heartbeat of a Dying Animal

At the side of the road

All alone in the snow

Lies an animal writhing in pain

No one cares, no one sees

This trashed little dear

To busy they are to take note

But someone will cry

Because kitty is gone

Just vanished without any trace

Then as cold grows the night

The heartbeats will die

And kitty will be no more

...something I had to write in order to deal with my inner turmoil over things passed...

So Much Frustration

It feels like ages since I wrote here last time.

Why?

Well, it's been ages. 

I don't even want to look at my last blog post in order to check the date. 

That's how long it's been. 

My New Year's resolution will be to write more, I think. 

Since we're already discussing the topic of writing, let me continue elaborating on that. My current frustration is rooted in writing, you see, or rather in my incapability of doing so.

I'm just bubbling and bustling with inspiration, and it wants out! However, I have a distinct lack of ideas, or, so I tell myself. But, that is a lie! I have plenty of ideas, but these are not what I feel like writing at the moment, and I'm the kind of person who needs to feel in order to write. 

I have this great idea, but it's just beyond my reach. I can almost taste it, sense it vaguely, and I've already made three attempts on capturing it. But no, it just keeps slipping through my fingers. Escaping my mind every time I make an approach. Thus, the inspiration has been unable to work itself out of my system and has slowly turned into frustration. And let me tell you, frustration-turned-inspiration is horrible. 

My first attempt depicted a person with a burnt face standing in the soothing rain. The raindrops tasted of salt and iron. 

My second attempt told about a slave whose collar grew tighter and tighter (if this was figuratively or literally I'm not sure). The slave was suffering, wondering in desperation how this had happened to them - they had always been a very cherished slave - all while their master towered above them, laughing maliciously at the slave's naïvety.

My third attempt turned out describing fingers playing with snow that was warm (or alternatively the one playing with the snow was immune to the cold). 

But that's all that came out of my rather lengthy (attempted) writing session. 

I know the most important thing about writing isn't producing solid text all the time, but all the unspent inspiration inside me has coiled into a big, gnawing lump that I cannot get rid of. And it is extremely frustrating. I cannot sleep, I cannot think clearly, I cannot concentrate on anything else because of that untouched creativity deposit. 

Sigh.

At least one good thing came out of this. If anything this has made me more determined than ever to keep on writing, and I'll try to improve as a blogger as well. However, I wonder if I need a theme, something that would be the main focus of my blog. Perhaps this would make it easier to keep writing regularly. The only problem is, I have no idea what kind of theme to pick... So, please, all and any suggestions are very welcome and will be considered as possible themes for this blog from here on now. 

black - grey - white

evil - neutral - good

the basic elements of most books and films

who do you side with?

i have no idea why, but i have a tendency of liking the wrong side - the evil one that is

i simply find evil characters more intriguing, even appealing

no, not in real life, but in literature particularly

i don't know why, but it always turns out like that

even in cases where i don't know that a certain character will later turn out to be evil

evil is forbidden, thus it's interesting

at least that is how i justify my hunger for evil characters

they can stretch the rules of morality to their liking

they lack (or posses?) something that normal characters do not

face it

without the antagonists books and films would, in many cases, be plain boring

there is however one big flaw in siding with the "wrong" guys

it's wrong - so they will never (or extremely rarely) win

they'll be eliminated

erased

such greatness to waste

perhaps, in a way, that is the charm of the wicked characters

and yet, occasionally, i do find myself longing for a change

a story - not horror - where the antagonist comes out at the top

because after years of seeing my favourite characters getting eliminated i'm starting to find it tiresome

the norm doesn't need to be changed

but i want just a slight diversion from the norm

just once in a while

....

my advise to you all:

do not fall for the "evil ones" if you aren't prepared to deal with a lot of sorrow and disappointment

ok, i might be exaggerating just a tiny bit

we're talking about fictional works after all

who dies and lives is just fiction

but still

as a change i'd love to read something where my favourite character doesn't die

luckily, from time to time, i favour characters other than the malicious ones 

ironically though

when the character i prefer is not a sinister one

in 9 cases out of 10

that person will end up dying anyway

i'm not even joking

i think someone is secretly trying to make fun of me

well, at least now

after 20+ years on earth

i am always prepared for the death of my favourite character

no matter the genre and no matter the character's disposition

i wonder...

is this punishment for finding the dark side in fictional works attractive?

good couldn't exist without it's counterpart anyway

so then, why is liking evil such a taboo?

i wonder, i really do...